College experience

      I'd start by saying, I don't really have a sidejobs or whatever, so I'd just tell about myself in this blog. My name is Farhan, and I am 22 years old. I am a tenth semester in English teaching major in UIN SALATIGA. I know, it's depressing right? Maybe some of you think like "Why the heck is this student stuck in this campus for five years?" or "Is he lazy or what?" But I'd tell you the truth on why on earth this student whose year is 2020 still stuck in the campus.

    When I was in college back then, I had nothing to do, except going to the campus and doing some homeworks. My mother has asked me to focus on college and not thinking about anything. It's for my benefit and for my health, because I've had a congenital heart disease, but in Covid era I was just helping my mother in the jewelry store while attending online classes. That's all I did, and she'd give me 20.000 IDR for just helping for half of day. I got 50.000 IDR sometimes, but helping my mother was a truly a beneficial experience I couldn't forget. 

    Then in my third semester I fell sick and was in the hospital for a week. I was paralyzed for days and couldn't do anything. I remember I returned home the day before Eid-al Adha, and I still couldn't move half of my body. Thus, in the 4th semester, my college was ruined because of my health. I rarely went to classes, I got E in most classes, I got low GPA after that, and I became depressed of how much I fell. Because of that, I decided to take less credits in the next semester. I thought everything would be fine. 

    But disaster struck again, my body was still weak and one day, on my way to get home from campus, I fell from my motorbike. I thought everything was fine because after the people helped me and I realized I got no injuries. Just a few bruises and a pain in my arm. When I got home my parents brought me to the hospital because my hurt a lot. They brought me to the x-ray room and when I saw the result, the bone was broken. Turned out after the doctor gave me a diagnosis, my body was still too weak to do normal activity, and I had to take a quick break again. I wanted to get heal, so in the sixth semester I took a semester gap or a semester break. Mr. Hanung actually supported my decision and gave me the permission to take a break first from college. I was doing nothing while I was taking a break, except healing my body and my mind. I just wanted to focus on myself first, to give myself peace, to accept myself that I was born this way-having a heart disease. So, all I did was going to therapy and doing nothing. I was getting away from smartphone too, to break the addiction. To get the best of me I was willing to do anything. To be healthy and to be in peace. Sometimes I write on my laptop, and it was a therapy for me to write stories in English.

    It's true I am so behind from my colleagues, they all are already graduating, and I am still stuck in here. Some juniors actually spite on me, but I just ignore it. Some of them just make fun of me for becoming the "eternal student" in the campus. But like do I really give a f--- about the obvious hate that they are giving on me? But what could I do? I was sick. I also got nothing to proof. But the lecturers care for me, and I am so glad about it. I'd just think: "It's okay, some people start late, life is not a race, we had different start lines, and I started all the way from the back." 

    Nowadays, all I do is just doing people's favor. I mean I'd do basically anything. Some people ask me to teach their kids English; I'd do it with or without money. I am still confused about what future holds for me. But I bet it'd be awesome, and I am excited for it.

Farhan Nailal Author 23030200060